Week 26 – The Good, The Bad and The Insanely Huge

I wrote an awesome blog post last night on my way to dreamland…can’t be too sure what all exactly happened between there and waking up this morning dreaming about an earful of ear mites…which resemble tiny maggots by the way. For the record I have no idea if there is any such thing as ear mites but I’m sure as heck NOT going to Google them. I just ate two delicious kolaches and I would like to keep them where I put them for now.

I remember bits and pieces of the post I composed in my head but the magic is gone…I guess it fell out my ear and the ear mites ate it.


It’s Week 26 for me and Week 13 for Stephanie - her first official week of the 2nd trimester! Woot woot! I was under the false impression that this was my last week of the 2nd trimester but I looked it up and I still have two more weeks. Blah! I have about 13-14 more weeks to go. It feels kind of impossible that I still have that much longer to go. I’m not sure that I can physically handle getting that much bigger! I do remember thinking last night that this baby is approximately 1.5 pounds and that means he has to grow about 5x that and that means I’ll probably grow between 10x - 15x what I am right now. WHAAAATTT??

At this moment I feel like the joy of pregnancy has been diminished slightly. I told Mercedes last night that I’m not too old to have kids but I feel ancient and I’m glad I’m not doing this again. I’m sure that was the hormones and the time change talking but I felt exhausted and huge and achy and huge. I sat down probably 4 times for a rest while cooking dinner last night. And I still have 13-14 weeks to go! I’ll admit that I wouldn’t feel deprived if somehow in the next few hours I magically reached 40 weeks and gave birth later this afternoon. I don’t have any newborn diapers but I have a carseat, a bassinet and boobs – the essentials. Kids in China don’t use diapers so I can deal.

Have you ever shaved anything south of the “equator” while under water? Serious question. That’s how it feels to shave while you’re insanely huge pregnant (at only 26 weeks). You can’t breathe! This is how it goes:

Take a deep breath
Lean over
Swipe, Swipe
Stand up
GASP
Lean over
Swipe, Swipe
Stand up
GASP
Forget it!

Especially since I haven’t shaved in about 26ish weeks…it’s kind of like trying to shave a bear with a Schick razor while under water. I think that’s the official definition of futile. I don't know why I even bothered trying when I felt so crappy...maybe because I felt so crappy...it just made me feel crappier.  But I do have a few smooth spots now...so it was a partial win.

It’s not all bad and insanely huge. The Nino is still good and insanely in-cutero (get it, get it?? Cute in-utero??). He’s grown enough now that my belly button is some weird misshapen mound thing in the middle of my belly. He’s getting stronger and his moves are very noticeable and visible from the outside. He’s just now getting big enough that he’s causing hard lumps on my belly wherever he presses. Maybe one day I’ll be quick enough to capture it on video.

My new prediction for this baby is that he will be bigger and darker than Jimmy. 13 or 14 more weeks until we find out if I’ve got the gift!

This week he is as long as an English Hothouse Cucumber (whatever that is…I only eat them after they’ve been pickled) which is about 14 inches long!

The Nino at Week 26

And here is a comparison picture.


Sorry its so small...not the belly...the pictures